my solution

so I've been slightly paranoid about chris. the last thing I want is for him to have another seizure. I have a feeling that he finds his seizures embarrassing. I see it in his eyes when I visit him in the hospital. I can tell he doesn't want people to pity him. he doesn't want people to doubt his abilities because of his medical condition. he avoids the topic rather than openly talks about it. and I don't completely blame him. but I'm scared his seizures are inevitable. I'm scared they're always going to happen.

at least I was scared. I realized that I can't be scared of life and situations we're faced with. I can't be scared of conditions we're born with and have no control over. because maybe we do have some control over it. I said previously that the two things that were the same between this seizure and his last seizure were that he didn't sleep well the night before and he was really stressed out. so what if I do my best to ensure he gets a good night sleep? I can make sure he goes to bed a decent hour. and take pepper out in the middle of the night so his sleep isn't disturbed. I can make sure a fresh cup of coffee is prepared for him in the morning (once we figure out how to fix our coffee maker).

and I can do whatever I can to de-stress his life. starting operation: de-stress our lives. some ideas I've got so far: 

• go on walks with the pups in the evening
• go to the 'rents to swim at least 3x a week
• talk to him in the morning about random stuff
• ask him how his day was after work
• drive him everywhere (not my favorite)
• make dinner together
• watch movies and our favorite tv shows
• play silly wii games
• play with the dogs

hmm...that's really all I can think of so far. all I know is that I'm not going to surrender to his condition. I'm not going to let it control our lives. I'm gonna do something about it.