this must be it, welcome to the new year

I think my main cause for disappointment for the year 2010 is my lack of accomplishment. I don't feel like I achieved any of my lifetime goals. I don't feel like I went anywhere in life. yes, I bought my first home and yes I started my first post-college job, but those were things that needed to be done - not dreams/goals I wanted to accomplish. and with the 7 months of living in our house, I haven't done too much to it to make it our home. I haven't hung pictures or even completely unpacked. and with my lack of motivation to much of anything, I was washed over by negative and depressing thoughts.

so when new year's day came along, I decided that this year I am going to get up and do something. not only will it keep my mind preoccupied and away from the dark side, but it will also challenge me to become a better person, which is my ultimate goal. for the past couple of days, I thought about how I wanted to do this - I have so many goals in life and honestly life is too short. then I thought, why don't I make a list of 12 things I want to get accomplished this year and challenge myself to do it each month.

then I saw the rest of the blogosphere came up with the same idea. (really? I thought I was a freakin' genius for this one!) oh well. that shouldn't stop me from pursuing what I want. one of my new year's resolutions was to do more stuff for myself, so I'm not gonna hold back.

here's my tentative monthly to-dos list (most of them stem from my 2011 resolutions):

1. no fast food and cook meals at home
2. exercise daily
3. spend more time reconnecting with chris
4. take more pictures
5. explore more unique and local places to eat and be entertained
6. write more poetry
7. do volunteer work
8. spend more time outside
9. bake
10. finish decorating tha crib
11. no tv
12. dress up

these aren't in the order that I'll be doing them and I may change them, but I think I have the ability to dedicate myself to each one for a period of time. I'm hoping that by making myself do something every day for a month (like exercising), will enable me to fit that activity in my daily life permanently. in other words, I don't want to do these things for a month then quit, I want to challenge myself to learn how to adapt my life around them. that's my ultimate goal at least.

I also want to dedicate myself more to blogging and not just about my boring, depressing life, but maybe ways on how to get yourself out of a hole and realize how great life is. basically, my blog is going to have a much-needed make over soon. ;)